Fearless freedom functioning

We are each here
to express our truth

For a while there
I thought
my truth
is not true enough
if it can be overridden by another
or ignored
or dismissed
or rejected

I thought
this pointed
to a flaw
in my truth

But my only responsibility
is to speak my truth
what others make of it
is their responsibility

I thought truth
has to be omnipotent
undefeated
unopposed
totally disarming
anything less
is just not the truth

But the power of truth
is fully its own
untouched
by outward action
by outward attitude
or reaction
incapable of being hurt
or compromised

Untouched
but not because
it won't let itself
be touched
Untouched
because
no matter what
it meets outside
and even meets fully
it cannot lose itself

I thought truth
cannot be walked over
or trampled
only the weak
and the powerless
can be wiped out
this way

But I forgot Jesus
I forgot what he gave
and what he received
on the cross

Even overpowered by ignorance
and outstripped by fear
the truth responds
with love

Walking up to
certain crucifixion
allowing fear to explode
into such emptiness
that each moment
each step
each blow
is received
in great innocence
without preconception
allowing
each moment
to die
into the next

Nothing and nobody
is held onto
and what is born
from such emptiness
arises from love
in love
as love
to love
It cannot
be known
in advance
but leaps into being
to serve
all there is

Jesus is
love manifest
fearless freedom functioning

Where shame and fear reside

Where does shame reside?
And fear?
and feeling betrayed?
or abandoned?

We think they reside
in an event
in somebody's action
in our own behavior
and even our own self

We think that
the fear is mine
my fear
the shame is mine
my shame
the betrayal or abandonment
is mine
all mine

And believing this
we draw them in
into our minds and hearts
into our beautiful bodies
we cleave to them
and they become us

But then they feel bad
and wrong
and uncomfortable
so we flee from them
try to escape them
somehow
run run run away
to some place good
and calm and positive
and manageable

We don't like bad news
especially right here
right within us
so we drink
we drug ourselves
we kid ourselves
we attach to this theory
and that philosophy
we distract distract distract
ourselves

We turn away
from our 'tainted' self
thinking salvation
is outside somewhere

And we would be lost
in this way forever
but for grace
and its messengers
exhaustion, courage and wisdom

It takes exhaustion
to stop running away
sheer exhaustion
lovingly forcing us to stop

It takes courage
to face the enemy within
the fear and shame
the abandonment
and betrayal

It takes wisdom
to drop all your weapons
to surrender
and to be led
within
deeper and deeper
not against the enemy
but with it and by it

For in the end
we find
that it is these
that we have called the enemy
which are the ideal companions
on this dark journey
the dazzling dark journey
into ourselves

As they lead us
beyond fear
beyond shame
and most importantly
beyond hope
to undivided love
untouched innocence
and dissolution
sweet dissolution

From here we see
with startling clarity
where the shame resides
and the fear
and the abandonment
and betrayal

They reside not inside
not in us
not outside
not in them or it
they reside in the way of looking
they reside in the perspective

The shame is felt
when we look at God
and find God wanting
the shame is felt
when we look at our self
and find we are less than God

The fear is felt
when we cut out
a piece of ourself
and believe it is the other
The fear is felt
in separation

The abandonment is felt
when we look at our self
and find it less than whole
We feel abandoned
in abandoning
our own wholeness

The betrayal is felt
when we look at our self
and choose to leave
for somebody else
or something
The betrayal is felt
in turning outside
in turning away

The mind- body
is an expression
of God
and like all expressions
it is limited

But where does
limitation spring from
We think and
we believe
that we are limited
because of a mistake
we made
or God made

When we look
through this perspective
we feel choiceless
like victims

But limitation
is no accident
It is the divine choice
to be
It is the divine emptiness
manifesting as
the particular
so that this amazing world
of experience
can be

Choiceless awareness
is the ground
and the womb
of choice and experience

So meet your self
your shame and fear
abandonment
and betrayal
as the choice it is
look from here
from the wholeness that is
and so discover
gloriousness
discover limitless self
appearing as you
and all things

Pain

Who knew
that pain
could be
such a companion

so moody
so demanding
so ready to tear me
apart

so loyal
so committed
so ready to hold me
in its embrace
over and over
and over again

so present
so exquisitely present
that I cannot avoid it
miss it
ignore it
or transcend it

so I do
the only possible thing;
I turn to it
again and again
I submit to it
be with it
be it

What was I
afraid of?
This pain is
a friend

This now

I am alone
but not lonely

I am empty
but not without

I am single
but not unwedded

I am constant
but not changeless

I am flow
but not without stillness

I am everything
but not without nothing

What am I?

I am you
I am you
We are one
We are that
Not even that
Just being
Just this
this now.

Love Manifest

What is love?
It is the seeing
of everything
simply as it is
without needing
to embellish it
or make it over
or change it in any way

What is love?
It is the being
with everything
simply as it is
without needing
to make it better
or make it look good
or tone it down in any way

Love manifest
is the human heart
beating strongly
quivering lightly
sustaining everything
by its fragile being

Love manifest
is the human heart
ready to live
ready to die
ready to plunge headlong
into what it knows not
for no other reason
than that is what it is
Love manifest

About thought

We think that
underneath each thought
lies an objective reality

We think that
a thought is actually
mind's articulation
of an underlying reality

We think that
thought is an outward
manifestation
of something that is actually there

In this way
we invest thought
with power
beyond its means

In this way
we create and inhabit
the world of virtual reality

Sure enough
thought-land is
a full-fledged mirage
capable of producing 'real'
feelings and sensations
But how real
is a mirage?
And is there not
something beyond a mirage
something that sees
the mirage for what it is?

A thought is only
a thought
nothing more
and nothing less

It can be as powerful
as a storm
when we invest in it
and as innocent
as a breeze
when we don't

The only thing
that lies underneath thought
is more thought
It's like there is
a bottomless thought cloud
floating about -
thought sustaining
more thought

Just like it is impossible
to exit a mirage
from any action taken
inside the mirage
so it is impossible
to exit thought-land
by means of a thought

Entering and exiting a mirage
happens by means
of that which is outside
the mirage

Entering and exiting thought-land
happens by means
of that which is beyond
thought

If life has brought
you to these words
and others like them
then you are already being nudged
by what is outside thought

Trust in that
to complete its work
without you
Simply step out of its way

To digest Buddha

When we admire beauty
from a distance
it feels good and safe

When we discover that beauty
to be ourself
it is sublime

We spend too much time
singing the praises
of beauty outside us
bowing to the divinity
of gods and masters outside us
quoting the great ones
to feel a tenuous connection

Perhaps now we can see
how unsatisfactory that is
like licking one's lips
watching another eat

Perhaps it is time now
for that great invisible non-existent chasm
to collapse

Perhaps it is time for you and me
to find the courage
to digest our own Buddha

Separation

Separation is a thin line
albeit very insistent
that says
I am this and therefore
not that
or I am this because
I am not that

But that line is erasable
It is tenuous
Don't assume that it
is your destiny forever
So question it sometimes

There is nothing so exclusive
that it can shut out
everything else
Separation is only a construct
in mind

When separation dissolves
we are open to being this one here
without being closed
to being that one there
for we are bigger than each of those
We are the infinity within which they arise

Knowing

I am the ground
I am the root
I am the trunk
I am the branch

I am the twig
and the leaf
at the farthest end
of the twig

I am so far
from the ground
so far
from the root

Yet as the tiny leaf
distinct from other leaves
and twig and branch
fragile and alone
I am connected
at all times
to the root
and something here knows that
undeniably, anavoidably, always

Tree of being

Solidly rooted
deep in the
primordial ground
of being

I move towards
the open skies
through trunk
and branches

Waving with the breeze
dancing with the storm
Sprouting leaves and flowers
Offering myself fully

Sweet being

Beingness cleaves itself
over and over again
so it may be aware
of itself
see itself
hear itself
taste itself
experience itself

Beingness cleaves itself
into seer and seen
so they may connect
via seeing
into listener and sound
so they may touch
via listening

Beingness cleaves itself
into you and I
so we may love each other
so beingness may love itself

And sweetest of all
beingness cleaves itself
so we may know
ourselves as beingness
so beingness may know itself
as beingness!

What else is here?

There is a time
in life
for problems
to be solved

This is but mind
unraveling itself

Then there is a time
in life
for a shift of attention
and for the question
to arise
What else is here?

What else is here?
besides the problem
besides the desire to solve
and besides the solution
if there is one

This is awareness
seeing itself
as mind and beyond mind

This is awareness
seeing itself as that
which holds mind

No need to be rid
of problems
No need for resolutions
They can be around or not

Something is more interested
in what else is here
beside the problem
and the solution

The time for solving
and the time for a shift
can be in any order
or even alternate for a while

Life lets us know
when it is time for what.

Flow

In the paradox
that is life
there is a tendency
to stagnate
again and again,

a tendency
for the water of being
to become little
cesspools -
stale and repetitive

And simultaneously
life in every moment
flows like a river
clearing out all stagnation

not as a static idea
but as a continual
dynamic flow
that is NOW

When the mind opens
to this dynamic now
gratitude arises
for stagnation and flow

Beyond imagination

In order for the new
to be born
the old must be let go of
completely

While the old is held on to
the only new that can appear
is a reconfiguration
of what has been

The ten thousand things
can be endlessly recombined
into what the mind
marvels at as new

The ten thousand and first
comes from the willingness
to leave the land
of the ten thousand

Beyond imagination
beyond imagination

Temple of Isness

We wander all over
with the mind
in the mind

We come home
to this body
in this body

This body is
reality in form
Temple of isness

This moment is God

Life presents this moment
and in the mind
we say it is this way:
good, bad and
a whole host of other labels

And mind says
this is not how it should be;
this moment -
it should be better
and different

And so we have this moment
but we don't taste it
pulled away from it
by mind's ideas
of how it should be instead

Then perhaps we are drawn
to something beyond mind's words
and we fall deeply in love
with this moment
just as it is

Oh the profound joy of it
The unbreakability of it
The wholeheartedness of it
The fulfillment of it
This moment is God!
God is but this moment!

When Sorrow visits

Have you had someone visit
from the Sorrow family?
Did you allow him in at all?
Perhaps you did, but reluctantly?

The Sorrow family has a bad name
Perhaps you have experienced
this sometime in an earlier visit?

So when he smiled, you didn't
And when he offered a hand
you didn't take it
And when he gave a hug you held back?

Perhaps you tried to figure out
how this recent visit
was related to others in your past?

Perhaps you started remembering
how others in your family
were hurt by some
among the Sorrows?

Perhaps you tried to analyze
if somehow you had invited
quite inadvertently,
this unwanted guest into your home?

And in all this flurry of thought
lost in your own world
you didn't even sit this Sorrow down
nor offer him some tea
or learn anything about him alas

Perhaps this one was nothing
like his family at all
Perhaps he had no bad intentions
but simply stopped by, passing through
seeking only to embrace you
for a moment?

Perhaps you might
have enjoyed his visit
and made a friend,
never needing to fear
another Sorrow again

Already this

There is no moment
when this is not

There is no place
where this is not

There is nobody
Who this is not

This cannot be given us
Nor taken from us

So what comes between
You and this?
What insists
I am not this

Only a voice
in the head
That is already this
through and through

Coming from wholeness

We are wholeness
exploring separation
through mind

and not separation
seeking wholeness
in mind

Unearned love

Something is afraid to fall
into this love
that is so steady
and so unearned

Something can't accept
this okness
that is so everpresent
and so unconditional

Something says
I'd be a fool
to let down my guard
so completely

Something says nothing
could be that constant
and be relied on
so absolutely

Afraid of being hurt
by its own innocence
something wears a mask
of continual mistrust
viewing everything
through narrow slits
fashioned by fear

What will it take
to let oneself slip
into the ocean of love
that is oneself?

Uncondtional love

We look for
unconditional love
in being loved

But unconditional love
is in the loving
of everything

The undivided attention
to what is
right now

The elephant in the room

There's an elephant in the room
We know there is

Too solid to miss
Yet missed anyways

This one doesn't trumpet
Does not need to make noise

It doesn't even move
It is very still

It isn't grey or brown
It has no color

We try to feel its shape
but it has no boundary

We walk about the room
holding our hands out

It is everywhere we touch,
this strange elephant

So we get a clever idea
We try to push it away

We push and we push
Then a curious thing happens

The elephant allows the pushing
It offers no fight!

So we feel kind of silly
But it doesn't stop there

The elephant surrounds
every hand that is pushing

Wait - the elephant is
every hand that is pushing

It is every hand
that's pushing itself away!

It is so so vast
It is the room itself

No - the building, the road
the earth, the sky
the universe, outer space ...
everything everywhere....

This elephant is not vast
It is vastness itself

Boy we are sure
this is no ordinary elephant

Heck we can see
this is no elephant at all!

What is it, what is it
we frantically ask

This 'thing' that is here
but cannot be named

This thing that is solid
but cannot be touched?

And then the final touch
The absolute masterstroke

This' thing' is not separate
from the me who is asking

This 'thing' is myself
asking itself what I am!!

This 'thing' is I
I am this 'thing'! :)

The vastness can come
in limited form too

The elephant in the room
that non-elephant 'thing'
is an elephant too
after all!

Truth, you know,
is stranger than fiction :)

What is real

What is real
needs no dressing up

What is not real
needs to be shrouded
in complexity
and in sophistication
in cleverness
and in brilliance

When the void
that nobody can escape
is frightened of
itself as the emptiness
it continually seeks
to fill itself up
with this and that

When the void
that nobody can miss
recognizes itself
as all there is
it is the fullness
bursting out
in all directions

Willingness - 2

If there is unwillingness
don't take it
as the absence
of willingness

Willingness is here
alongside
unwillingness

Simply notice it
and it reveals itself
ever more clearly

This is not grace
that hides sometimes
or presents itself selectively

This is grace
everpresent
Only mind does the hiding
from grace

Grace is here right now
offering this possibility
to simply notice
the willingness that always is

Such love!

Willingness - 1

When the willingness to meet this moment
meets this moment
it opens its arms
and says Come to me

When the willingness to suffer
meets suffering
it opens its arms
and says I am here for you

When the willingness to fear
meets fear
it opens its arms
and says I hold you

Willingness does
what will cannot
Willingness does not arise
from will
but grace